He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize