Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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