That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
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