He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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