38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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