they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
