Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
