foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
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