i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
