so explain again why im purple
no
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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