If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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