Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
