herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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