She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
