i can't believe i had my finger in that
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
