oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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