Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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