I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
