As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
