Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Houston, we have a squirter
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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