the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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