nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
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