direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
