Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I want her autograph on my taint
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Randomize
