Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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