____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
