he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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