Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
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