talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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