It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
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