I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize
