she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize
