is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
