so that wasnt chicken after all
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
Randomize
