I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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