Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
