I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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