i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
