marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Well I left you a voicemail but you probably won't be able to hear it because my mic is fucked up. I think you need to come down here and take it in for me.
I hate this phone so bad I'm going to lose all of my friends because of it
Yeah...you probably will...
well, you're marked off my christmas card list for next year.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
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Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
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Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.