Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
