But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
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