your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do