Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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