AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
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