Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Randomize
