i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
of course. lets lasso hookers.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
