there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I think I sprained my soul last night
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Randomize
