Do you still have your period?
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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