don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Randomize
