i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
