she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize